lol

mothurs:

me: yes self-positivity !!! i love myself! i am a ray of positivity that radiates sunshine and happiness! i am an ethereal creature! i am the light!
me: i want to die i hate myself

yzma:

i swear to fucking GOD

swarnpert:

the phrase “when pigs fly” is very outdated because the police have helicopters

dietcondoms:

dietcondoms:
i’m in love……
well not “in love” but i’m turned on

wtrsagb:

I’m in the bathroom and a girl just came out to her friend ad my shit is halfway out my ass and they heard some plunk into the toilet and one girl said “Is anyone else here?” why do I get stuck in situations like this

biolegend:

Newton’s lesser known 4th law of motion.

asian:

if i was hot i would be such a slut

THE SIGNS AND THEIR PERSONALITIES

Stop Sign: Strict
Speed Limit Sign: Cautious
One Way Sign: Stubborn
Yield Sign: Shy
Keep Out Sign: Secretive